Effingham County Victim-Witness Assistance Program, Inc.

"Overcoming is much harder than succumbing." -Fran Ross

Story by Katrice Williams | Photos by Shelia Scott

Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.” The Effingham County Victim-Witness Assistance Program,

Inc. (EVWAP) persists to help victims of domestic crimes do just that: take the first step of courage towards help. EVWAP will celebrate their 30th anniversary and annual vigil on October 18, 2019 with the theme: “Thirty Years of Excellence.”

   EVWAP, a 501(c)3 program, continues to diligently strive towards their biggest goal: “to assist victims of violent crimes, encouraging them to lead healthy, functional lifestyles.” The agency provides various comprehensive support and advocacy services. EVWAP’s Executive Director Fran Ross and her entire team have a genuine fervor for the priceless initiative. The team currently consists of: Victim Services Coordinator Monica Black, Agency Administrative Assistant Kara Parrish and EVWAP Intern Andrea Galvin.

   The vigils are held to remember and pay homage to those who have died due to domestic violence. It is also a time to recognize those who have overcome their circumstances. Past vigils were customarily characterized by prayer, a candle-lighting ceremony and the presentation of information, namely statistics. This year, various activities have been added. Community leaders in attendance

may include local law enforcement officers, county judges, attorneys and local sponsors. A few clients “who have overcome” their violent situations will also attend, as they are the main reason for the event.

   “It’s for them,” Fran declared.

The event will include a “sit-down dinner, a silent auction and entertainment.”

Fran understands the significance of the vigil. The EVWAP team has become all too familiar with the pain, agony and turmoil suffered by domestic crime victims, including those tragic cases where an individual waited too long to leave a violent offender…waited too long to take that first step towards a new life of hope. “You can spend a lot of time leading horses to water, but you can’t make them drink. Ultimately, it is up to them. When they’re DONE, that’s when we can help. At the end of the day, if 10 girls come in and even three overcome, we’ve done our job. It’s very impactful when we see someone walk away and do well. It’s also very impactful when we don’t,” Fran stated.

While some individuals escape violent relationships right away, agency statistics reveal that “the average client, 97% being

female, goes back at least seven times. Fran, though, understands that there is usually much more going on beneath the surface than meets the eye.

What is more, the staff cares about their clients and their clients’ rights. They take client confidentiality very seriously and wholeheartedly respect every legality involving victim-witness confidentiality. “We want everybody to be comfortable coming here, knowing that their information will be kept safe,” Fran stated.

EVWAP has helped numerous individuals who have come through the door; a few, however, hold a special place in their hearts.

She mentions one in particular: Marlee Edgar. “She is a jewel; she’s special to us. She’s somebody that has exceeded all expectations. A lot of people come and go,

but the ones who actually get through are embedded in our brains forever,” Fran said.

Marlee Edgar is a Jacksonville, Florida native who moved to the local area in June 2018. Marlee has a nine-year-old daughter and is newly married. She met Fran on July 28, 2018 after receiving her business card from a police officer. The officer had responded to a domestic violence call from Marlee at about 3 a.m. on that same morning. When officers arrived on the scene, they observed a distraught, scared and battered Marlee. The offender had fled the scene–her boyfriend of nearly 11 years who had moved to the area with her. Officers searched the area for him for nearly three hours before he was finally apprehended. Currently, he is incarcerated.

Marlee recalls the nightmare that she lived for so long—physical assault, yelling, screaming and threats with guns. Similar to many stories of abuse, it did not start out that way. In fact, she was initially attracted to her ex-boyfriend’s seemingly strong work ethic and kindness. As he eventually lost his job, Marlee was the provider for most of their relationship. In addition, he forged wedges in her relationships with family and friends; this led to Marlee’s own mental and emotional isolation from others which ensured that the evil committed against her would not be revealed. Unsurprising, after his arrest, he was deemed a “manipulator and sociopath.”

“It wasn’t financial dependency, which is the #1 reason women stay. It was completely emotional dependency, and it’s hard to come out of that. He’s one of our worst offenders,” Fran remarked.

Marlee admits that she did leave on numerous occasions but would go right back, largely due to the offender’s brainwashing that often caused her to feel guilty.

“We would separate for a few days or a week, and he would lure me back in. Things would revert; it was just a vicious cycle,” Marlee said.

Marlee reached a low that she did not know could exist in her life; whether “alcoholism, drugs or cutting,” she sometimes entertained various self-coping mechanisms, things that she thought she’d never do. Life often looked bleak, and Marlee didn’t see a way out. “The only way I saw that I was going to get out was, I kill myself, I kill him or he kills me; it had gotten that bad,” Marlee admitted.

She knew, though, that she did have something special to live for—her daughter.